Welcome to The Nineteenth Hole. Photos (with or without captions), anecdotes, etc welcome for insertion. Emails to Tam Bowie

<>--------------------<>

<>--------------------<>

Click here for Bamber's Inspirations

<>--------------------<>

Credit Crunch hits MGC
The one pound entry for the Gents Medal sweep proves too rich for one MGC member.

<>--------------------<>

Happy Birthday Bamber!
Everyone's favourite quiz master was treated to a chorus of "happy birthday to you" in the clubhouse to mark his 60th Birthday. Tam is slightly suspicious of the proximity of Bamber's 60th to that of Prince Charles. Could there be a dark secret about twins being separated at birth? You know, the prince and the pauper. What is the facial feature(s) which arouses our suspicion? Anyway, enough conspiracy theories for one day. Happy Birthday to a very youthful looking Graham Bell!

<>--------------------<>

MGC supports the Scottish Society for Autism
MGC was delighted to agree to a request from the Scottish Society for Autism to support a recent charity event. MGC donated a round of golf for four for the auction which took place during a dinner dance in aid of the charity. Handing the gift to Ian Thomson and Cheryl Fitzsimmons of Parc Group (who organised the dinner dance) are MGC Captain Jimmy Crawford (left) and clubmaster Paul Wade.

<>--------------------<>

Ian Poulter's Autumn Collection
An anonymous model poses for Ian Poulter's latest Autumn Collection for the fashion concious golfer. Note the right sock (Man at BHS, £3 for three pairs) is worn 1 1/2 inches above the gaiter this season. The muted tones of the carefully tailored slacks (50p at Poundland) beautifully complement the grip of the two ball putter clone (£4 from American Golf second hand rack). The gaudy cerise top is worn slightly open to reveal the sweater in this season's favourite shade: Indeterminate. A hint of the Arnold Palmer golf shirt (£8 from Edinburgh Woollen Mill discount bucket) brings a splash of excitement to the look. The ensemble is topped off with the plain golf cap (freebie from CDR Cables Ltd).

Ian Poulter also sensationally revealed that this look will be the basis of the next Ryder Cup team uniform, which Poults has been commissioned to design.

<>--------------------<>

Words of Wisdom from Craig Allion

Click here for a laugh! (or a cry....)

<>--------------------<>

Movie Review

Me, Dougie Kirkham and the star of the show, Derren Urwin, were playing in a medal last year. Teeing off at the first Derren managed to duff his tee shot just over the whins. He then shanked his second on to the practise fairway. He followed this with a great recovery shot from there to the green, and sank the 20 foot putt for par.

The description of the hole thereafter became known as............ The Sh**eshotshankredemption.

Jolly Good 12/10/08

<>--------------------<>

There is more than one Olympian in MGC. The surname of DH's is an otter’s lair (sorry, with my mindset I just cannot help it!)

Clues for mine are 1988, Seoul, also team event and scorer of GB’s first ever goal in this event at Olympic finals.

Click here for the answer!

I guess Al Tait quipped “Derek and the Dominies”. Derek Hunter’s only encounter with dominoes was in the Rams Head bar when two “bears” invited us to participate in a game – it was an offer we could not refuse. We let them win!

Bob Marsden got a birdie? He never managed that in all the years he partnered me in the club fourballs.
Bamber 28/9/08

<>--------------------<>

Beat this for a birdie....
Bob Marsden must have had one of the most unusual birdes in the history of the club. Deep in concentration Bob launched his drive at the third one medal day. Just as the ball left his club Bob looked up to see a car starting the run along the road across the fairway. The inevitable happened and Bob's ball hit the car and ran back down the fairway away from the green. Amazingly the driver did not stop. Unperturbed, Bob went on to make a birdie! This event was witnessed. Can anyone beat that..........

<>--------------------<>

Where is the off switch on this flippin' electric trolly?
Note the position of the golfer relative to the ball in this picture. He looked up to see his trolly disappearing up the fairway. Hence the caption. Tam can't reveal the name of the golfer, but wonders how many members spell their name Allyn? This is a true event which took place during Saturday's Autumn meeting. Only identities have been disguised to protect the incompetent.

<>--------------------<>

Wit yes, wisdom?....

Whoever said Convenorship of Match and Handicap was not for men of wit and humour? Clearly, those who subscribe to this (mistaken) view have never met Alastair Tait.
Earlier this summer Alastair was playing behind a four, all of whom were school teachers competing in the Glasgow Schools' Teachers Golf Competition and one of whom was Greens Convenor Derek Hunter.
As the four teachers were preparing to tee off at the 10th, Alastair wandered over. A smile creased his craggy Dundonian face, "Ah", he said "I presume this is Derek and the Dominoes".
Whilst I appreciate that Alastairs joke may be somwhat lost on anyone under the age of 65, at least it does prove that Brian Mooney is not the only funny man in Milngavie Golf Club.

Barred from Milngavie?

and speaking of Brian Mooney....
Ignoring advice from his adoring public the Bard of Milngavie is, once again, reaching for the stars. In pursuit of elusive fame our intrepid thespian has enterd the Glasgow version of "They've got talent"...(honest!) Even more incredibly, Brian has made it through to the semi final at a venue and date still to be announced. We'll let you know the details nearer the great day...in order that you can make alternative arrangements on that particular evening!

And, now, one for all you anoraks out there. Amidst all the understandable and well deserved celebrations over the achievements of the Scottish athletes, cyclists and rowers in Beijing, did you know that Milngavie Golf Club has its's very own Olympian? no kidding!

Clues? 1960, Rome Olympics, team event,

answers please to Tam Bowie...

DH 6/9/08

<>--------------------<>

Auld Murroch asks, "Who turned up for the CJMorley at 3.15 on Saturday instead of Sunday. Then turns up again on Sunday only to have it rained off? Better luck next weekend Colin !"

<>--------------------<>

The recent lightning strike on the clubhouse reminds Tam of the famous Lee Trevino quip "If there is lightning, hold up a one iron. Even God can't hit a one iron." (Health and Safety note for juniors: If there is thunder or lightning get off the course immediately, no ifs or buts.)

<>--------------------<>

Important putt in the JM Gardner Synchronised Swimming Competition.
Tam Bowie: "What's the read for this putt?"
Caddie: It tends to break to the deep end on this green.

Ross: "Look Dad, One Per Hole is easy. You should try it...when you've finished looking for your ball.....again."
Dad: Any more of your cheek and you're on a yellow card wee man.

Is this a picture of the Milngavie representatives at the Undertaker of the Year Awards? No, it's actually the Winners of the County Texas scramble at Milngavie on 23/9/07.
L to R, Jamie Murray, a county guy, Stuart Graham, David McKirdy, and Scott McCain
Goodness knows what some of the faces would have been like if they had lost!

John tries out the new on-course portaloo.

Milngavie Golf Club members marshalling the 1st hole and 2nd tee at this year’s Barclays Scottish Open Golf Championship held at Loch Lomond Golf Club, won by Northern Ireland’s Graeme McDowell. G-Mac was quoted as saying "I owe everything to this group, especially John Hamilton who noticed a wee problem at the top of my backswing on the first day"

After another disaster Barty tries to find inner peace.

Word gets out that Tam Bowie is looking for a partner for the four ball.

Tam Bowie's brother finds his spirtual home.